Everything is going to be alright; maybe not today, but eventually. There will be times when it seems like everything that could possibly go wrong is going wrong. And you might feel like you will be stuck in that rut forever, but you won’t. Everything is as it should be.
It’s crazy how you always end up where you’re meant to be — how even the most tragic and stressful situations eventually teach you important lessons that you never dreamed you were going to learn. And sometimes you learn that the disappointments in life are truly blessings in disguise. Having nothing will allow you to appreciate everything. It’s failing miserably over and over again that will allow you to succeed. Failing is one of the greatest things in the world, as it reminds us how imperfect we are. It reminds us how much we need to learn in order to become the people we truly wish to be. Because sometimes the life you’re leading is so far from the life you are meant to be living that losing everything is the only way you can make it out on top.
The moment you realize that not even loss itself can stop you, that sadness, despair, anger and fear cannot hold you back, is the moment you become perfect. Perfectly flawed, but perfect nonetheless. I acknowledge that the biggest failures in my life have become some of my greatest assets. After experiencing a major disappointment last night, I immediately turned my heart towards gratitude and found my strength again.
I am a strong and independent person — to a terrible fault. In the pursuit of self-sufficiency and survival, I build walls around what I really need and want. But I’m quickly learning that there is strength in softness. Finding the courage to keep my heart open and ask for what I need is an on-going challenge, but I’m always pleasantly surprised by the results. I need to honor my sensitivity. I need community, friendship, companionship and love. I need understanding, affection and touch. I need passion, desire and spontaneity. I need to feel cherished and supported. I need to remind myself that it’s okay to ask for these things and I always have the choice to walk away from relationships when those needs are not being met.
So in the end, I choose brave. Because we always have the choice between courage and comfort; we can’t choose both.